My Children Are Driving Me Insane (And 30 Other Mom Confessions)

:: Disclaimer: I love my children. They are complete joy to me.  That said, it was 60* in July and pouring down rain when I wrote this. We were all cold and missing the sunshine and warm weather. It would drive any mom a little loopy.

1. I hear "Hey Mom" 6534 times a day.  Once while writing this sentence. Really.

2. I'm regretting the beans I fed them for supper.

3. A small football being used as a volleyball just flew through the air, bounced off Cora's arms, went in a laundry basket and bounced out.  (See #4)

4. Our oldest son has literally no coordination.

5. His sister does.

6. On my 6th "go to bed warning", child #3 was just threatened 5 minutes early bedtime for each time I had to tell him to go to bed. He now doesn't like me.

7. I used 15 plastic cups today for 15 sips of water. For 4 children.

8. The cat is standing outside in the pouring rain meowing, refusing for some reason to go inside the garage. It is really annoying.

9. The three year old, in a fit of temper, told me he was going to throw away his Thomas the Trains. Apparently when he was bluffing because when I proceeded to help him gather them up to throw them away, the fit of temper became a hysterical rage. He is now sleeping in his Thomas the Train sleeping bag next to his Thomas the Train track and trains by his Thomas the Train pillow.  There probably is no danger of him throwing the trains away.

10. When the children weren't looking, I ate the last S'mores brownie. Before lunch.

11.  I also ate a few Golden Oreos from my son's stash of treats too.

12. We buy ice cream and hide it from our children.

13. I tell my children I am going to move to Hawaii if they don't stop arguing.  They don't believe me.

14. Cade hid his green beans in his napkin and tried to throw them away. First time for that. Or is it?

15. Our 13 year old had to walk past his pile of clean clothes twice and still forgot to take them downstairs.

16. Farmer Jed is staring at me across the room.

17. Sarah Lynn is too.

18. I just tripped on a toy grill.

19. The toy ketchup bottle is in a dangerous location as well.

20. I am in charge of VBS crafts and I am pleased to say I didn't get any paint on my clothes. The same cannot be said of some of the children or the church carpeting. Sorry.

21. We just watched Little House On The Prairie and I had to explain why a hot air balloon would be considered new and dangerous.

22. They get a kick out of seeing an outhouse.

23. 2000 sq feet on the main floor of my house and my children are in the same 10 sq ft that I am in.

24. I enjoy showers for the "me" time I get. I kid, I kid. 

25. "Mommy, I missed you so much" followed by a big hug. That is what takes place after a 15 minute shower.

26. My husband and I have gotten used to repeating ourselves up to four times per sentence because at least one child didn't hear the conversation and feels like they were left out.  We have taken to just automatically repeating ourselves instead of waiting for the "what did you say?".

27. Would you like a snack? Would you like a snack? Would you like a snack? Would you like a snack?

28. My washing machine broke and I was without one for 4 days. Diamonds are not a girl's best friend. Washing machines are. And we cry when they don't work.

29. I went downstairs to the boys' room and I got scared.  I came back up stairs. It is now clean. I don't have to be scared.

30. School will be starting before I know it and I will miss this crazy bunch.